17.4.09

Zac Efron in local council shame

The disturbed residents of Bristol have rejected the question Who says you're only young once? posed by Zac and a crack team of Holly woods writers which has been published on the sides of buses and other public outdoors areas in the area. At a council meeting it was decided that the sentence would be committed to the community chest of 'worst slogans for selling a film in recent history' and would not be on public show again to be seen by local people in the area. The advertising fees paid to ask the hare-brained question in question will now go towards helping young mixed up metaphors such as You are not the sharpest bunny in the drawer, and It is rocket science keep away, into employment and off the streets.

It has been suggested by bus drivers that the tightly-knit bus community without such adverts or even passengers on them are going to feel the trickledown slogan crunch because of Zac and the question at hand. A number of bus drivers are rumoured to accidentally be advising people that There are several better ways to travel.

A local residents' committee in central Bristol has also expressed deep concern over an increasing trend in the use of fatous slogans for actual film titles. Yesterday Bristol residents' newly-formed Committee Upstanding Novel Titles and Taglines (CUNTT) concluded that The Boat that Rocked be pulled from local cinemas and all prints be put in the Richard Curtis landfill toilet at once providing there is some space left. Investigations are being launched into whether makers of Fast and Furious have used a simlilar ploy but commentators suggest there is little point in doing this.










16.4.09

The Chestnut


Emerges beaten and red in the face

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